Self-Care and Self Love: Essential Aspects Of A Healthy Life Journey With Yourself

Self-Care and Self Love: Essential Aspects Of A Healthy Life Journey With Yourself

By Sierra Allia and Yolanda White

Rewind about a decade ago, and the concept of taking care of oneself and pampering oneself – especially women – was one that you rarely heard. Of course, we’ve always had nail salons and massage parlors but I remember the idea of being a hard working, industrious woman being drilled much more. Now, though, self-care and self-love are buzz words that are rarely missing from the front cover of your favorite magazine or the landing page of your favorite blog. Now more than ever, in the midst of a global pandemic, on the verge of an economic recession, ongoing political and social unrest, everyone is on edge due to an overall uncertainty about the present and the future.  

It goes without saying that mental and spiritual needs need more tending to than physical, but self-care can actually benefit all three sectors when done right, and can be helpful in navigating life even during periods of distress. Let’s be clear – in the context of this post – we are not talking about the self-care definition that WHO and the health industry promote to help people avoid illness. The self-care we are referencing is best defined by Dr. Maria Barratta of Skinny Revisited,

“Self care in essence is the mindful taking of time to pay attention to you, not in a narcissistic way, but in a way that ensures that you are being cared for by you.”  

Tending to ourselves first starts with recognizing our own needs and areas where we are lacking. No matter where you live, the stresses and responsibilities of daily living sometimes crowd out time for introspection, but it’s a must. A part of caring for one’s self is taking quiet, unpreoccupied time with yourself – just like you might for a friend who needs to talk, or on a date with a significant other. Approaching yourself as a friend, as someone you are pursuing and seeking to maintain a relationship with, is a great way to ensure that that special someone (you) is getting what he or she needs. With a friend or mate, there are often activities we like to share over and over again, together; likewise, we should have a regular routine of activities to share with ourselves. Don’t know where to start? Yolanda White, self-care aficionado and DAYO Women Loungewear founder and designer, shares with us her top… 

5 RITUALS FOR THE CULTIVATION OF SELF-CARE AND SELF LOVE:

• Take time to indulge in things that you love  – enjoy a warm bubble bath, listen to soothing music, take a walk, ride a bike, or just dance. Have fun – you deserve it!
• Spend time with people who lift your soul – have those virtual drinks with your girlfriends, take a moment for deep conversation with your bestie, or cuddle with your partner. 
• Take a moment to recognize yourself – Give yourself a pat on the back, write positive thoughts in your self-love diary, acknowledge your accomplishments or take yourself on a date to celebrate- do it for yourself daily!
• Treat yourself to something that makes you smile – buy yourself your favorite candy, candle or loungewear. You don’t have to go broke to remind yourself that you’re special, but you don’t have to put yourself last either. 
• Try something new – go to a new restaurant, try a new lipstick color or play a new game that sparks your imagination – you will not know if you like it, until you try it! 

I’m sure you can think of many other things you could do that would be exclusively for your enjoyment. Write these things down and pencil them – no PERMANENT MARKER them – into your calendar. At the end of the day, what we owe ourselves most is time. Time is often referred to as the most valuable currency – invest in yourself and see the results grow.

After reading all of this, you might say to yourself, “All that sounds good, but I have kids, I have family, it’s just hard to carve out that time.” Let me tell you something. Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18.1% of the population every year. Depression, one of the leading causes of disability, affects an estimated 264 million people globally. Workplace stress and burnout lead to over 120,000 deaths a year. Taking time to care for ourselves outside of work and family responsibilities means our life – it’s a must! Most of all, our mental state affects our ability to be happy, to sustain healthy relationships and to be productive.

“My self-love journey began over four years ago, and it has transformed my life,” White shares. “I have created a life that I love and a company that is committed to helping other women deepen their self-love too.   I want women to see, hear and love themselves unconditionally, despite all that they have to do or can’t get done.” To remind women that they need to take time for themselves, White has published a new diary,  Lounge In Self Love, filled with tips and exercises to make your self-love journey even easier. Self-love doesn’t have to cost money; it is about taking time to reflect, discover, explore, and commit to uplifting rituals that make you feel good.